I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
