i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
