Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
