what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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