Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
