also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
It's just like the Real World with babies
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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