It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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