She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize