I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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