gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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