So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
