why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
