oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Welp...herpes.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Randomize
