You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
