i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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