I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
