Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
