Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
