We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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