After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
