she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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