P.S. I can't hear my feet
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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