the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
