Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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