i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
He passed out mid-signature
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Randomize
