I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
