i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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