After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
