i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
