Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize