No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
