can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement 😭😂
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