What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
one might say we're banned from that church
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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