Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Randomize
