It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
