Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Randomize
