butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
