Me too!
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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