Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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