dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
