I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
