pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
We're too hungover to prance.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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