even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
