she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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