Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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