And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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