she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize