You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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