Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Randomize
