You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
