so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize